Pizzles snacks for dogs

A pizzle by any other name . . .

I was looking at this jar of smokehouse dog treats (snack mix) and noted that the main ingredients were bull and steer “pizzles”:


Penis treats for dogs

WTF is a pizzle? The dictionary says that pizzle is the Olde English word for penis, and I guess pizzle sounds better than other euphemisms for penis. But with the strict truth in advertising laws, I would expect better disclosure, as I'm not sure that I want my dogs eating a penis.

Are pizzles just for animal food? No, evidently you can buy pizzles in the grocery store:


Delicous Pizzles?

Now, my Rottweiler’s have been chowing-down on penis’s for several weeks now, and I’m not sure that I’m comfortable with them developing a taste for clamping down on my manhood. The manufacturer should let people know that what they are really buying is not a “snack mix”, but a jug of dicks. I advocate a more obvious name. maybe:

- Dongs for dogs
- Jug O’ Wangs

Upon further research, I see that pizzles are used in many products. How about this golf putter, the pizzle putter:


The pizzle putter

I love their comments:

“Limited supply. The bulls don't give these up without a fight."

Parking rage: Dentist shoves woman

Check-out this shocking video, tempers flying over a parking space:

Violent confrontation over Parking Space

Man, I'm glad I don't live in the city anymore. . .

The man is a dentist, a job which has one of the highest rates of depression and suicide of any profession.



Personally, I watched the tape, frame-by-frame, and it looks to me like the woman:

1 - Saw that he was a doctor (has money)
2 - Saw the reporter and camera filming
3 - Attacked the dentist and fell backwards suspicously

I'm not condoning what the dentists did, but people play to the cameras.

Tax law encourages murder & suicide in 2010

Congress and the Fed know that they can manipulate taxpayer behavior at-will by changing the tax laws.

But we should not let congress pass tax laws that cause people to die, as-is the case in 2010 when thousands of people will commit suicide or be sent to a premature grave.

Stop the killing now before it’s too late

It’s a long story, but in the year 2010 we see a “golden year” whereby all inheritance will be totally tax free:

2007 - 45% tax on inheritances over $2 million
2008 - 45% tax on inheritances over $2 million
2009 - 45% tax on inheritances over $3.5 million
2010 – NO Taxes!!!!
2011 - 45% tax on inheritances over $1 million

If you accept my argument that Congress controls human behavior, it’s clear that there will be thousands (if not tens of thousands) of people who will either be murdered or commit suicide to save the inheritance tax.

Personally, I find this tax offensive. Taxpayers already paid 40% tax on their money when they earned it, and the government should not re-tax the heirs.

For cheap old folks who want their inheritance to pass in-full tax free, 2010 is a great year to commit suicide. The article offers some suggestions for killing yourself early to avoid having your heirs pay millions in taxes:

"What we're recommending is a high-quality hunting rifle. It's dependable, easy to operate and almost certain to be completely undamaged by the incident, so that it can be passed on in mint condition to the heirs--who, of course, would pay absolutely no inheritance tax on it."

I’m predicting that there will be a measurable spike in the premature deaths of people in December 2010, all directly attributed to these tax laws.

Stop the government-encouraged suicide

It’s not gone unnoticed that congress has given hundreds of thousands of people an incentive to save their heirs millions of dollars by killing themselves in 2010:

“In fact, many practitioners have suggested that in 2010, wealthy clients who are not physically well should consider chartering a plane to the Netherlands or some similar country that permits assisted suicide.”

If somebody was dying of a terminal disease and could screw Uncle Sam out of $20,000,000, I’m sure that they would consider checking-out a few months early. It’s beyond irresponsible to give people an incentive to die.

Murder rates will skyrocket in 2010

I believe that in the last quarter of 2010 we will see a measurable increase in murder, as heirs decide to bump-off Granny rather then loose millions of dollars to inheritance taxes.

While murder for inheritance is nothing new, there can be no doubt that a few people will kill their aging relatives in order to gain millions of dollars.


From Allposters:

So, what can we do? It’s simple, just construct a mortmain per stirpes to ensure that your death in 2010 will result in your fortune going to some ridiculous charity . . .

Sexism and racism in the IT computer profession

I must speak to a man!

Oracle guru Jon Emmons has noted a scary problem in the degradation of the quality of today’s computer professionals.

Once the bastion of professional computer scientists, today we see a horrid influx of open racism and hate speech, even on the web sites of the world’s top vendors.

“If there are any competent Asians, I failed to meet them.”

Asian or Arab origin people are incompetent. My point is proved by the fact that they have always been slaves and will remain in such conditions. The west has always dominated the east.”

The worst part is that this offensive content was not removed from the vendors web site, and Jon notes that it’s not a good idea to tolerate racism:

“More amazing to me is that Oracle doesn’t pursue and remove these posts. After all, for every person who will speak up against this racist crap there are ten who will just leave with a bad taste for the people who host the content.”

In my company I am also seeing sexism, especially from callers with very poor speaking skills.

Enter the Sexists!

Last week we had two calls from people who sounded extremely stupid, and they confirmed this when they refused to speak with Robin, our lead engineer, stating that it was degrading for them to speak to a woman!


Sexism runs rampant in the IT industry

Oh Brother! Robin is a retired Nuclear Engineer and served as the Chief of the North Carolina Radioactive Materials section, and she is one of the most intelligent people I know.

It is astonishing that some ignorant-sounding goofball would have the nerve to tell her that they are superior to her. It’s beyond offensive.

I work for a minority-owned corporation and I detest bigots of all kinds. We don’t want any business from sexist idiots.

Mach 20 aircraft being flight tested

I grew up around military aviation, and as most kids who grow up near an Air Force base I’ve always been an aviation buff, and I remember being the only kid in my high school with a pilot’s license.

My parents were neighbors of Chuck Yeager (my Dad and he were both young captains, fresh out of WWII, and both with a passion for Poker games):



If you remember the movie, “The Right Stuff”, Chuck was a central character, the true hero and forbearer of the astronaut. He hails from West Virginia, a mountain boy who made good and has a great southern drawl. Even today, Chuck’s suave air traffic control mannerisms are taught and copied by pilots all over the world:

“His smooth West Virginia drawl and easy going demeanor in the cockpit inspired every pilot whether military or commercial and all air traffic control operators to adopt that same easy tone while talking in the mic.

In fact pilots and air traffic control operators are taught the Yeager drawl during training.”

Here is Chuck with Sam Sheppard, the feller who played him in the movie:



The SR-71 up close

In 1969, I got to see an SR-71 flying. I lived less than a quarter mile from the main runway, and everyone in my neighborhood could tell what types of fighters were flying by the way that they vibrated our windows. One morning there was a huge “VOOM” in the pre-dawn darkness, and I went straight over to Base OPS to see what kind of toy made such a ruckus. It was a real SR-71, and I caught a glimpse as they rolled her into a private hanger. I’ll never forget the leading edge of the wings were glowing orange:.

In less than an hour she emerged, and the take-off was unforgettable. He rolled on forever, and at one point I thought the SR71 would roll off the end of the high desert runway, but she rotated and leapt straight into the stratosphere at a 55% angle. It’s just like the photo’s.

When the afterburner kicks in, there are amazing rings in the contrail:



On to hypersonic speeds

Hypersonic is considered Mach 5 (3,000 MPH) or faster, and I don’t believe that the SR-71 still holds the speed record (only Mach 3), after nearly 40 years.

Imagine flying at Mach 20 with a RAM JET (check out this report from Rice University). Reports from Sweden indicate a triangular Aurora aircraft cocked at Mach 20, and the plane flew over the whole of Russia in just a few hours!

Click here for some artists rendering of what this amazing hypersonic aircraft looks like. Imagine the rush of moving 5x faster than a rifle bullet.

Here is a mockup of an Aurora aircraft, from a good site “above top secret”.

Now we see glimpses of “Project Aurora” a super-secret USAF project that claims to have gotten to Mach 20, over $14,000 miles per hour!

Imagine flying coast-to-coast in less than an hour . . . .. .

Redneck wine: Booger Swamp wine

There's a new Booger in town

Booger Holler is a sacred site in North Carolina, and Booger Mountain is a leading supplier of Christmas trees (remember their motto “Always pick a Booger”).



Booger Mountain is a multi-million dollar business, and many North Carolina natives resent the mass-marketing of Booger Mountain Christmas trees. I love the signs the competitors use, reminding us: “Don’t pick a Booger”:



Anyway we now see this new Booger, Booger Swamp wine!

Introducing Booger Swamp Wine

A fantastic new white wine blend has appeared in North Carolina and it’s taking the state by storm. Sold by Brushy Mountain wineries, the new wine is dubbed “Booger Swamp”.



Here, they explain the choice of Booger Swamp for the name of this great new wine:

"During the Civil War, people living in the vicinity of Booger Swamp (an area southeast of Elkin on state roads to Yadkinville), used the swamp as a hiding place whenever Yankee troops passed through the area. For protection, the people told their children not to go in the swamp because “boogers” or spirits, lived there and would get them if they did.

Since the Civil War, the name has continued for the general area. There is a Booger Swamp Road today. Recently, a woman came into the tasting room and said that when she was a little girl, her parents told her that “boogers” and people without heads lived in the swamp. This was to keep them from taking short cuts as they came home from school.

Again, this seemed a rather charming and historically appropriate name for our really fine white blend.

Now, there's a pick where you cannot go wrong:

One-armed golfers make the best golf instructors

One armed golfers are the BEST!

If you want to learn golf properly, you cannot beat a one-armed PGA Master Professional. Being a one-armed golfer required incredible talent, and I’ve never seen a better instructor than Brad Clayton, the one-armed golfer.

Brad has a new golf book coming out next year that shows some great tips for achieving the perfect swing. Brad’s golf Zone also has a state-of-the-art learning area with video feedback, critical to any beginner:


The lab at the Golf Zone in Oxford

It’s incredible to see a one-armed golfer smash a long drive out-of-sight, and it inspires confidence, and demonstrates that the art of the long drive is more about form than raw muscle.

The gals go crazy for Brad’s handsome looks and natural charm, and ir does not hurt that he is a super-nice fellow, too:


Brad Clayton
A one-armed PGA Professional


One armed golfers gain national attention

This TIME Magazine article on the amazing one-armed golfers notes that one-armed golfers face incredible challenges and it discuss the North American One-Armed Golfer Association:


The one armed golf team

"Having one arm is difficult for balance, hard for timing and hard for getting the clubhead in the right spot at impact,"

Brad Clayton is very active in donating his time to teach golf to disabled war veterans, and I can’t say enough nice things about him. We are going to encourage Brad to enroll in this one-armed tournament, and whether he plays of not, it’s going to be a fantastic pre-show to the Ryder Cup.

Poodle Topiary Grooming

Poodle Topiary

American dog owners go to great lengths to pamper their pooches, but Poodle Topiary is the latest US fad.

This contest show how creative folks can use Poodles as topiary, sculpturing them into fascinating designs:

Hotel nudity causing problems

If the low exchange rate were not enough to keep you away from Jolly Ole England, we now see reports of a 70% increase of naked Brits roaming the halls of major British hotel chains:

To most Americans, all we know about this England country is what we see on TV, relying on shows like Graham Norton and Benny Hill to teach us about our British cousins.

Word 2007 has arrived

For years, Microsoft has been promising to offer-up XML tagged documents, a Godsend to business professionals who want interoperability when sharing documents with the non-Microsoft world.

But bend over and spread your cheeks, Bill Gates has done us again.

Internally, the Microsoft Office 2007 XML files are a collection of xml files (and images) that are zipped into one file, in a format completely unknown to any word processor on the planet except, of course Word 2007.

In order to keep-up their mandate to American businesses zillions of dollars in lost productivity, Billy Gates has chosen to make the default file types as docx, requiring millions of people to upgrade to Word 2007 or go through time-consuming and annoying conversion processes.

As hundreds of millions of people struggle with this, the total waste will surpass entire lifetimes.
Read more about this onerous implementation, one that will cost hundreds of years of lost productivity:

http://www.dba-oracle.com/t_word_2007_docx_file_conversion.htm