Thursday, May 06, 2010

The Ant and the Grasshopper Fable as told by Liberal Communist Hippies

As a young child, I vividly remember the classic Aesop’s Fable “The Grasshopper and the Ant”, especially horrifying because the Grasshopper dies a painful death.

This is heavy stuff for a four year old, here is the abbreviated fable:

The original Ant & Grasshopper Fable:

The ant works hard in the summer heat, preparing for winter.

The grasshopper thinks that the ant is an idiot for working, and he fiddles and plays all summer.

Winter comes, and the starving grasshopper pleads with the ant to share his bounty.

The ant tells the grasshopper to go screw himself and sits at his cozy fireplace, sipping nice Chianti as he watches Mr. Grasshopper die from starvation and hypothermia.

The Ant insists that the Grasshopper die for his transgressions

I remember being horrified at how callous the ant was, letting the poor grasshopper die, but it taught me the intended lesson; that the world does not owe you a living.

The Communist Liberal Hippie Version of the Ant & the Grasshopper

Today, it would not be politically correct to tell young children this fable, where a poor Grasshopper dies only because he is lazy and good-for-nothing.

The Grasshopper thinks that work is for idiots

Instead, the modern version of the ant and the grasshopper story would go something like this:

The ant works hard in the summer heat, knowing that it is his duty to support his fellow creatures.

The grasshopper claims to suffer from ADHD and is declared disabled, even though he could work if he wanted to.

Winter comes, and the starving grasshopper is outraged, demanding his “fair share” of the ant’s bounty.

Mr. Ant is widely chastised and ridiculed for being a selfish bastard, and the grasshopper feels justified for stealing all of the ant's belongings.

Here is a good video of this fable, from the point of view of the lazy and shiftless hippie liberal communist: